Monday, 4 May 2026

Michael

This is a version of a review airing on ABC Victoria's Statewide Mornings program in April 30, 2026.

(PG) ★★★

Director: Antoine Fuqua.

Cast: Jaafar Jackson, 
Juliano Krue Valdi, Colman Domingo, Nia Long, Miles Teller, KeiLyn Durrel Jones. 

"Tippy toes!"

So let's get the icky stuff out of the way first. This film dodges the sexual abuse allegations against Michael Jackson by ending before the point in history where they happened. According to Variety, that's because "attorneys for the Jackson estate, which served as a producer, realized there was a clause in a settlement with one of the singer’s accusers, Jordan Chandler, that barred the depiction or mention of him in any movie". The film was supposedly originally going to be bookended by the allegations, but had to change tack because of the discovery of this settlement clause. 

So regardless of whether the film intended to include the allegations or not, the film I'm reviewing does not include them, nor does the film encompass a period in time where those allegations exist. Call it whitewashing, call it a hagiography, call it lying by omission - I don't disagree.

But the film before me is not about that. Instead, I'm reviewing a film about how a remarkably talented boy from Gary, Indiana, who was beaten and abused by an overly-driven father, became the biggest musical star on the planet, and who changed the face of music by being extraordinarily talented. What came after that (becoming a human punchline and being uncovered as an abuser of children) is not in this movie because it happened later.



Leaving all the discussion about what is and isn't in the film aside, Michael is a by-the-numbers biopic not a million miles from Bohemian Rhapsody. It ticks off its story beats and historic moments with a minimum of fuss or depth or examination, doing the bare minimum required to tell the tale of Jackon's progression from pint-sized prodigy global megastar. In that sense, it works - this is a beginner's guide to Jackson's life, and as such, it does that well.

The key arc is Jackson's attempts to free himself from his father. While it would have been nicer to dig into that further, and to get the perspective of his brothers (or even some understanding of who they are and what they thought of the whole thing), it does give the film an emotional anchor and a vague sense of tension.

Having said that, there's definitely a lack of depth to the film. It moves from one event to the next without ever really digging deep into the motivations or meaning of it all. Yeah, it's cool to see him bringing Crips and Bloods together for the Beat It film clip, but the film doesn't dare to draw a line between this and the own violence he experienced at the hands of his father, or to find any real reason for the out-of-nowhere peace move no one asked him to make.

What is truly amazing about the film though is Jaafar Jackson. He nails his uncle's speech patterns, voice, dance moves, and demeanour, and manages to never make it feel like a caricature, which is remarkable when you consider that Michael Jackson, for a lot of his life, seemed like a caricature to the world at large. Jaafar does a fine job at showing there was a human in there somewhere, at least as much as the script allows.

And there are some hints at the future weirdness. In Michael, Jackson has no friends, and he is most at home around children. His mother and his chimp Bubbles are the only people he has non-transactional relationships with. He's obsessed with perfection, is eternally trapped in his youth, and has a strange connection with Peter Pan. Again, none of this reaches the depths that are necessary, but at least the film acknowledges its protagonist is not a "normal" person by any definition of the word.

The other highlight is, of course, the music, though there's arguably too much of it in places - some songs make their point in the film, and then keep going. And going. But there is no arguing against the fact this is phenomenal music, and it would have been great to see more of how it was made, especially considering Jackson wasn't renowned as an instrument. Berry Gordy (Larenz Tate) and Quincy Jones (Kendrick Sampson) are set up, flitter into the film and then are gone, so more of them would have been amazing too. But maybe that's a doco for another day.

People will want to hate this because of what's not in the movie, and that's fair enough. But judging this film purely by what is on the screen, and the story it's setting out to tell... well, it's actually not a bad film by any stretch of the imagination (but then nor is it a thriller). Michael is a snapshot of Jackson's rise to the top, and it summarises that rise neatly, quickly, and with huge dollops of great music.

Saturday, 2 May 2026

A History of Music

Supergrass, live at the Forum, Melbourne, 2025. Pic by me.


Here's a collection of my ABC articles on music:

April 2026
Is Something For Kate frontman Paul Dempsey Australia's best cover artist?

January 2026
The trends and records to watch in triple j's 2025 Hottest 100

August 2025
Paul Kelly's Rita Wrote A Letter the latest in a long line of sequel songs

August, 2024
Who's the biggest one-hit wonder of all time?

July 2024
triple j's One Night Stand is coming to Warrnambool, a region with a rich musical history

April 2024
What Taylor Swift's secret musical weapon has to do with Aussie comedy trio Axis of Awesome

January 2024
Kylie Minogue among potential record-breakers in triple j's 2023 Hottest 100 countdown

June 2023
Foo Fighters are grieving the only way they know how — through rock 'n' roll

January 2023
Could some records tumble during triple j's 2022 Hottest 100 countdown?

October, 2022
Revolver by The Beatles has just been remixed and re-released — but is it scraping the bottom of the barrel?

February, 2022
Dolly Parton finally receives nomination for Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Why has it taken so long?


Sexism in Australia's music industry still rife, but change is coming

March 2018
The Thin White Ukes, paying homage to David Bowie on the ukulele

January 2003
From Delta Goodrem to Metallica, here are some of the biggest albums of 2003

July 2002
How Brisbane band george made classic Aussie album Polyserena

January, 2002
From Avril to Eminem, here are the best albums of 2002

January, 2001
From Kylie to Tool — here are the best albums of 2001

December, 1999
Today in History, December 30: Beatles star George Harrison stabbed at home

December, 1995
How Coolio’s Gangsta's Paradise became a 'solid gold classic'

October 1995
'The Wall for Gen X': 25 years of The Smashing Pumpkins' Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

January, 1995
Nostalgia alert: Here are 30 big albums from 1995

April 1994
Kurt Cobain's legacy is evident in the music from the year he died

January, 1993
How Radiohead single Creep became a '90s classic despite being 'deleted' by their label

January, 1991
1991 saw the music industry turned upside down, and 30 years later, its echoes remain

November 1988
Celebrating 30 years of Aussie bands bringing live music to regional Victoria with The Push

January, 1986
From Madonna to Metallica, these are the big albums turning 40 this year

January 1983
40 years of Eurythmics' Sweet Dreams, the 'home recording' that took the world by storm

September 1982
Forty years ago, Goanna's Solid Rock took Indigenous rights to the masses

May 1981
In the Air Tonight's influence, intrigue, and THAT drum break that endures 40 years on

January, 1976
Fifty years ago, music was on the brink of major change 

September 1975
Pink Floyd's album and ode to Syd Barrett Wish You Were Here turns 50

March 1973
Pink Floyd's enigmatic, record-breaking album The Dark Side Of The Moon turns 50

November 1972
Fifty years of Carly Simon's You're So Vain and the mystery man at its heart

April, 1972
Rocket Man changed Elton John's career almost overnight — 50 years on, it remains an anthem

November 1971
Fifty years of Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven — the epic all epics are measured against

August, 1971
How Life On Mars? evolved from Sinatra revenge to Bowie epitaph over 50 years

July, 1971
Imagine 50 years of John Lennon's 'anti-religious, anti-nationalistic, anti-capitalistic' anthem

September 1969
John Lennon wanted The Beatles to make a follow-up to Abbey Road — this is what it might have sounded like

Wednesday, 22 April 2026

Animal Farm (2026)

This is a version of a review airing on ABC Victoria's Statewide Mornings program in May, 2026.

(PG) ★★

Director: Andy Serkis.

Cast: (voices of) Seth Rogen, Gaten Matarazzo, Woody Harrelson, Kieran Culkin, Glenn Close, Laverne Cox, Steve Buscemi, Jim Parsons, Andy Serkis, Kathleen Turner, Iman Vellani.

"And then I said, 'why yes, I do want to roll around in my own filth!'."

The idea of doing a modernised CG family-friendly adaptation of George Orwell's legendary fascism allegory Animal Farm sparks two major questions - how will they tone down some of the darker elements of the original story, and will that dilute the power of its message?

Director Serkis and screenwriter Nicholas Stoller have a decent crack at it here, and are willing push things in some cases. But ultimately this is a dark tale that feels largely too dark for young kids, yet not actually dark enough to do Orwell's story justice, making you wonder if this could ever really work for a family audience.

The story follows the animals of Manor Farm, who fight back rather than be sent to the slaughterhouse when their drunken owner Farmer Jones goes broke. Under the leadership of Snowball the pig (Cox), the animals begin to run the farm themselves, but things take a turn when a pig named Napoleon (Rogen) decides he would make a better leader.


Animal Farm has been adapted twice before, both times aimed at family audiences, to middling reviews and less than enthusiastic responses. This version is likely to receive about the same reception - it's too grim for the littleys, too kidsy for older kids, and too watered down for adults.

They get some things right though. The introduction of a new character, Lucky the pig (Matarazzo), to serve as audience surrogate is helpful, and many of the core elements of the book remain - the slogans, the fates of several characters, and the final image of Orwell's book, for example. 

But where the story tries to modernise, be cool, and appeal to a new young audience, the film feels off, like it has a trotter in two worlds. There are the obligatory dance bangers and pigs doing silly antics to appeal to the kiddies, but it's at odds with the central tale about how communism works in theory, but not in practice because power corrupts, money is the root of all evil, and people are pigs. The famous final image of Orwell's book where the humans and pigs are indistinguisbale from each other is not the end of the film, for example - instead the movie has to find a "happy ending", which is understandable, but this ain't it.

The voice cast is excellent though, and definitely elevate the production - Matarazzo, Turner, Rogen, Culkin, Vellani, Harrelson and Parsons are all great. 

Serkis and Stoller get points for trying, and they almost pull it off. There are moments of brilliance here. But getting Orwell's cautionary tale to work for all-ages on the big screen just ends up being a mismatch of dark tone and kidsy japes, with the political message lost in the scraps.

Wednesday, 1 April 2026

Hoppers

This is a version of a review airing on ABC Victoria's Statewide Mornings program on April 2, 2026.

(PG) ★★★★

Director: Daniel Chong.

Cast: (voices of) Piper Curda, 
Bobby Moynihan, Jon Hamm, Kathy Najimy, Dave Franco, Eduardo Franco, Aparna Nancherla, Tom Law, Sam Richardson, Melissa VillaseƱor, Karen Huie.


"Wanna lick me? Parts of me are hallucinogenic."

Hoppers is bonkers. It has the most insane plot of a Pixar movie since Up, but it's also the best film the animation house has produced since Soul in 2020.

Part-eco-warrior fantasy, part-love letter to the good in people, part-animals-go-wild comedy, Hoppers has a lot to say, which it says in between manic bursts of hyperactive insanity. In other words, it's exactly the kind of film that Pixar does so well, dialled up to 11 in some places.

Hoppers is the story of Mabel (Curda), a teen desperate to save a small glade from destruction to make way for a freeway. While trying to protect the patch of woodland from the evil hands of City Hall, she stumbles on a piece of secret technology that will allow her to mentally inhabit a small robotic beaver - a move she hopes will save the glade and have no horrible repercussions whatsoever.



Like I said, the plot is bonkers. The only criticism is that its key plot point - the ability to transfer your consciousness into a realistic animal avatar - comes out of nowhere. There's no real set-up for it, no suggestion this is set in a world with far-out tech, or that the inventors of this tech are anything more than run-of-the-mill college professors. It means Hoppers' script asks for a massive leap of faith - it doesn't just want you to suspend your disbelief, but set it on fire and throw it in the river. If you're on board for this potential shark-jumping moment then you can properly strap in for the literal shark-jumping moments that come later.

This very, very important plot point is dealt with efficiently though, and getting it out of the way quickly helps because it means the film can get on with what it has to say, which is a lot. Yes, it's funny and it's madcap, but in that classic Pixar way it's about a hundred other things - it's about the environment, feelings of inadequacy, trust, the potential for goodness in people, biodiversity, the power of nature, the importance of place, working together, and the absolute shitshow of destruction humanity is raining down on the planet one glade at a time.

Yeah, there are preachy moments, but the script by Jesse Andrews delivers most of them with eloquence and poignance. Hoppers wears its heart on its beaver fur sleeve, and it's all the better for it. The emotional notes are big, but so are the laughs and the lessons.

As I've said a billion times in reviews about family films, the best ones are the films you can go back to at any age and get something out of. While this skews older than some Pixar movies due to the villainous escalation in the third act and its hefty environmental themes, it has most-ages appeal that ensure it will grow with its junior audience.

Like the beavers it stars, Hoppers is a fascinating beast - it's cute and interesting and strange, and the world is a better place for its existence.

Friday, 20 March 2026

Listening to 500 albums in one year

 

Updated: April 28, 2026

Back at the start of the year, my colleague Olivia Sanders mentioned one of her New Year's resolutions was to listen to a different album every day. 

A lightbulb went off in my head - that was exactly the kind of resolution I needed to shake me out of my musical malaise and to focus my erratic listening habits. I asked if she minded if I did it too, and Olivia said 'go for it'. We then went on my regular music segment with ABC South West Victoria's Jeremy Lee and talked about our musical quest of 2026.

I'm using this resolution as a way to stop myself from listening to the same old records (as pictured above) and make myself listen to different things - new albums, the old albums I've always meant to listen to, the gems friends recommend, the classic albums I should know better, the deep cuts I've missed over the years, the albums I need to be reacquainted with. I listen to each album at least twice, I jot a note or two in a spreadsheet and move on.

But as time has gone on, I've started to think, why stop at 365 records? I started going through two or three albums a day quite easily some days. I did some quick maths - 500 records in a year seemed vaguely achieveable. 

So here we are. And here's what I've listened to so far.

172 Stella Donnelly - Beware Of The Dogs (2019)
171 Faye Webster - Underdressed At The Symphony (2024)
170 CMAT - Euro-Country (2025)
169 Lorde - Virgin (2025)
168 Harry Styles - Kiss All The Time. Disco, Occasionally (2026)
167 The Pretty Things - SF Sorrow (1968)
166 Broadcast - The Noise Made By People (2000)
165 David Byrne - Rei Momo (1989)
164 The Beta Band - The Three EPs (1998)
163 Marcia Hines - Shining (1976)
162 Ol’ 55 - Take It Greasy (1976)
161 Little River Band - After Hours (1976)
160 The Penguin Cafe Orchestra - Music From The Penguin Cafe (1976)
159 Skyhooks - Straight In A Gay Gay World (1976)
158 Sherbet - Howzat  (1976)
157 The Runaways - The Runaways (1976)
156 The Modern Lovers - The Modern Lovers (1976)
155 Ramones - Ramones (1976)
154 Blondie - Blondie (1976)
153 Camel - Moonmadness (1976)
152 Genesis - A Trick Of The Tail (1976)
151 Rush - 2112 (1976)
150 AC/DC - Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap (1976)
149 Peter Tosh - Legalize It (1976)
148 Jorge Ben - Africa/Brasil (1976)
147 Bob Seger - Night Moves (1976)
146 Joan Armatrading - Joan Armatrading (1976)
145 Joni Mitchell - Hejira (1976)
144 Tom Waits - Small Change (1976)
143 David Bowie - Station To Station (1976)
142 Laura Nyro - Smile (1976)
141 Bob Dylan - Blood On The Tracks (1975)
140 Bob Dylan - Desire (1976)
139 Eagles - Hotel California (1976)
138 Electric Light Orchestra - A New World Record (1976)
137 Sudan Archives - Natural Brown Prom Queen (2022)
136 Waak Waak Djungi - Waak Waak Ga Min Min (1997)
135 ABBA - Arrival (1976)
134 Wings - Wings At The Speed Of Sound (1976)
133 Queen - A Day At The Races (1976)
132 Boston - Boston (1976)
131 Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers - Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers (1976)
130 Taylor Swift - Folklore (2020)
129 Karnivool - Themata (2005)
128 Norah Jones - The Fall (2009)
127 Aerosmith - Rocks (1976)
126 The Avalanches - Since I Left You (2000)
125 Karnivool - Sound Awake (2009)
124 Dry Cleaning - Secret Love (2026)
123 Archie Roach - Looking For Butter Boy (1997)
122 Blood Orange - Essex Honey (2025)
121 Andrew Bird - The Mysterious Production Of Eggs (2005)
120 Gary Moore - Dark Days In Paradise (1997)
119 Various Artists - War Child 2 (2026)
118 The Rolling Stones - Black & Blue (1976)
117 Rose Peak - Brothers (2026)
116 Led Zeppelin - Presence (1976)
115 Taylor Swift - Evermore (2021)
114 Kiss - Destroyer (1976)
113 Peter Frampton - Frampton Comes Alive! (1976)
112 Van Morrison - Astral Weeks (1968)
111 Travis - The Man Who (1999)
110 Saya Gray - Saya (2025)
109 Bruce Springsteen - The River (1980)
108 Mitski - The Land Is Inhospitable and So Are We (2023)
107 The Pigram Brothers - Saltwater Country (1997)
106 Tangerine Dream - Sorceror (1977)
105 Mazzy Star - So Tonight That I Might See (1993)
104 Real Estate - Daniel (2024)
103 Real Estate - Atlas (2014)
102 Mitski - Nothing's About To Happen To Me (2026)
101 The Rolling Stones - Let It Bleed (1969)
100 Roxy Music - Avalon (1982)
99 Miles Davis - In A Silent Way (1969)
98 Air - Moon Safari (1998)
97 Lana Del Rey - Born To Die (2012)
96 Miles Davis - Filles de Kilimanjaro (1968)
95 Miles Davis - ESP (1965)
94 Billy Joel - The Stranger (1977)
93 Laurie Anderson - Mr Heartbreak (1984)
92 Mannfred Mann - Mighty Garvey! (1968)
91 The Rolling Stones - Goat's Head Soup (1973)
90 Pixies - Trompe Le Monde (1991)
89 Pixies - Bossanova (1990)
88 Kylie Minogue - Impossible Princess (1997)
87 Hilary Duff - Metamorphosis (2003)
86 Stevie Wonder - Songs In The Key Of Life (1976)
85 The Bees - Sunshine Hit Me (2001)
84 CB Ghost - Mayhemic (2025)
83 Boards Of Canada - The Campfire Headphase (2005)
82 The Jackets - Queen Of The Pill (2019)
81 Madonna - Ray Of Light (1998)
80 Aretha Franklin - I Never Loved A Man The Way I Love You (1967)
79 Balu Brigada - Portal (2025)
78 Nathan Cavaleri - Miracles (2023)
77 Yungblud - Idols (Complete) (2026)
76 The Underground Lovers - Dream It Down (1994)
75 Manic Street Preachers - Everything Must Go (1996)
74 Brian Eno - Another Green World (1975)
73 The Beatles - Help! (1965)
72 Steely Dan - Aja (1977)
71 Keli Holiday - Capital Fiction (2026)
70 Add N To (X) - Avant Hard (1999)
69 Cold Chisel - East (1980)
68 Hunters & Collectors - Human Frailty (1986)
67 Bring Me The Horizon - Amo (2019)
66 Sex Pistols - Never Mind The Bollocks, Here's The Sex Pistols (1977)
65 Neil Young & Crazy Horse - Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere (1969)
64 Beyonce - Lemonade (2016)
63 The 1975 - The 1975 (2013)
62 Bring Me The Horizon - That's The Spirit (2015)
61 Angine de Poitrine - Vol.1 (2024)
60 Lauryn Hill - The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill (1998)
59 Rob - Make It Fast, Make It Slow (1978)
58 David Bowie - The Rise & Fall Of Ziggy Stardust & The Spiders From Mars (1972)
57 Rocket Juice & The Moon - Rocket Juice & The Moon (2012)
56 Jean Michel Jarre - Oxygene (1976)
55 Diana Ross - Diana (1980)
54 Bring Me The Horizon - Sempiternal (2013)
53 MGMT - Congratulations (2010)
52 Djo - The Crux (2025)
51 Blur - Parklife (1994)
50 Blur - Modern Life Is Rubbish (1993)
49 Blur - Leisure (1991)
48 Geese - 3D Country (2023)
47 Fela Kuti & Africa 70 - Zombie (1976)
46 Orquestra Afrosinfonica - Orin, A Lingua Dos Anjos (2020)
45 Wet Leg - Moisturizer (2025)
44 David Bowie - Low (1977)
43 Garbage - Garbage (1995)
42 Tom Waits - Bone Machine (1992)
41 Beck - Everybody's Gotta Learn Sometime (2026)
40 The Divine Comedy - Liberation (1993)
39 Prince - Purple Rain (1984)
38 Super Furry Animals - Rings Around The World (2001)
37 Bruce Springsteen - Born In The USA (1984)
36 Joni Mitchell - Blue (1971)
35 Beck - Mutations (1998)
34 Sombr - I Barely Know Her (2025)
33 Tame Impala - Currents (2015)
32 Lorde - Pure Heroine (2013)
31 Olivia Dean - The Art Of Loving (2025)
30 Bloc Party - A Weekend In The City (2007)
29 Midnight Oil - Blue Sky Mining (1990)
28 Betty Davis - They Say I'm Different (1974)
27 Marvin Gaye - What's Going On (1971)
26 George Harrison - All Things Must Pass (1970)
25 Frank Ocean - Channel Orange (2012)
24 Bill Withers - Just As I Am (1971)
23 MGMT - Oracular Spectacular (2007)
22 Billy Joel - Turnstiles (1976)
21 The Music - The Music (2002)
20 PJ Harvey - Stories From The City, Stories From The Sea (2000)
19 Kate Bush - The Red Shoes (1993)
18 Kate Bush - Hounds Of Love (1985)
17 Florence & The Machine - Lungs (2009)
16 Bruce Springsteen - Born To Run (1975)
15 Cameron Winter - Heavy Metal (2024)
14 Kendrick Lamar - To Pimp A Butterfly (2015)
13 Ed Sheeran - + (2011)
12 Carole King - Tapestry (1971)
11 The Beatles - Yellow Submarine Songtrack (1999)
10 Huey Lewis & The News - Sports (1983)
9 Huey Lewis & The News - Fore! (1986)
8 Fleetwood Mac - Rumours (1977)
7 mclusky - The Difference Between You And Me Is I'm Not On Fire (2004)
6 mclusky - The World Is Still Here And So Are We (2025)
5 Billy Joel - Glass Houses (1980)
4 Mike Keneally - Wing Beat Fantastic: Songs Written By Andy Partridge & Mike Keneally (2012)
3 Blondshell - If You Asked For A Picture (2025)
2 Gang Of Youths - Go Farther In Lightness (2017)
1 Grant Hart  - Insurrection (1989)

Thursday, 12 February 2026

TV review: The Muppet Show (2026)

(PG) ★★★★

Director: Alex Timbers.

Cast: Bill Barretta, Dave Goelz, Eric Jacobson, Peter Linz, David Rudman, Matt Vogel, Sabrina Carpenter, Maya Rudolph, Seth Rogen.

Spot the human.

There were three reasons Jim Henson subtitled the first episode of The Muppet Show "Sex & Violence" back in 1976.

Firstly, it got your attention. Secondly, it's a wonderfully absurd joke - a family-friendly puppet show wasn't going to feature the kind of sex and violence you think of when you hear the phrase "sex and violence".

But thirdly, the OG series (1976-1981) did actually feature sex and violence, albeit in a very Muppet kind of way. The endless slapstick of Mad Harry's explosions and Miss Piggy's karate chop is hilarious and, well, violent. And if you don't think there's any sex in the Muppets, rewatch the original series and report back.

This 50th anniversary TV special definitely nails the sex and violence - having Sabrina Carpenter sing Manchild amid a bar brawl is vintage Muppets. And that's just the opening number.

But this was the moment in the show when I knew this reboot, spearheaded by Evan Goldberg and Seth Rogen, understood The Muppets and got the brief. The tone is spot-on, but it goes beyond imitation. It understands the mix of song and show that was the Muppets' stock in trade - that wondrous mix of absurdism and vaudevillian humour and pure performance. It's a type of program from a bygone era, and thankfully they don't try to update the formula here. They just lean into it.


And just as the original series isn't flawless, neither is this anniversary show. A segment where Rizzo and his fellow rats sing The Weeknd's Blinding Lights falls very flat, but that wasn't unusual for some of the musical numbers on the show back in the day, so I guess that's in keeping with the original tone.

The gang couldn't have asked for a better guest star than Sabrina Carpenter. Aside from being "so hot right now", her playfulness and willingness to do the silly things is endearing and fun to watch, and she seems right at home in the Muppet Theatre.

Back in the early '80s, I watched the original series religiously with my parents, every Saturday evening. Mum and Dad laughed at different jokes to the ones I laughed it, but we all loved it, evidently for different reasons. 

This time around, I watched it with my 10-year-old, and we both laughed at different jokes and we both loved it. I can't think of a more fitting way to say this is the perfect way to celebrate 50 years of The Muppets. 

Wednesday, 11 February 2026

I finally watched Zack Snyder's Justice League

Zack Snyder's Justice League

(MA15+) ★★★★

Director: Zack Snyder

Cast: Ben Affleck, Henry Cavill, Gal Gadot, Jason Momoa, Ray Fisher, Ezra Miller, Ciaran Hinds, Amy Adams, Connie Nielsen, Diane Lane, Joe Morton, Ray Porter, Amber Heard, Willem Dafoe, JK Simmons, Zheng Kai, Peter Guinness.

"So we'll all get our own spin-off movies, right?"

I realise I'm very late to the party with this one, but my 10-year-old and I have been doing the DC thing lately, and we just did Justice League. Once again, it's a massive disappointment of a film, but it made me realise I couldn't put off watching The Snyder Cut any longer.

And it's coming up on the fifth Snyderversary of the Snyderest version, so let's pretend that's a good reason to do this.

Many millions of column inches and YouTube minutes have been dedicated to comparing Whedon's OG version with Snyder's troll-satisfying director's cut, so what I'm saying is probably not new. 

Except to say, it's a bit unfair to compare the pair.

There are plenty of reasons to hate Whedon, but his version of Justice League isn't one of them. It should instead be seen as more reason to hate the idiots at Warner Bros. Whedon was hired to do a job under very trying circumstances and delivered a film that, while not great (I gave it two and a half stars, it's 39 per cent on Rotten Tomatoes), did what Warner Bros asked - it clocked in at two hours, and it had a lighter tone.

That the film bombed commercially and artistically is on Warner Bros, not Whedon, because of the restraints placed on the last-minute fill-in director, and the evidence can be found in Snyder's cut.

But, as I said, the two versions are apples and oranges in terms of context.



Whedon had to meet a deadline, under very clear instructions. Snyder had years to tinker, and was basically given carte blanche to deliver the film he wanted to deliver. Whedon took someone else's work, hacked and slashed at it, and delivered a film that was probably as good as it was ever going to be in that abridged format (which was not very good).

And as I said, the evidence is there in the fact the first two thirds of the film are essentially the same. The difference is that Snyder's version, unimpinged by studio meddling, is allowed to breathe, and given time to run. Whedon's version trims and trims while ensuring it still makes sense, and little more.

As a result, in Snyder's cut, character motivations are fleshed out and make more sense, or, at the very least, make the characters resonate more. The motives of Batman, Flash, Aquaman and even Steppenwolf become clearer, but it's Cyborg who truly wins in this version. He gets an arc, a backstory, goals, and a goddamn reason to exist in this film beyond "because he's in the comics". Yes, Whedon did Cyborg dirty, but it was at the bidding of Warner Bros, and if you're going to cut stuff, then you cut the stuff that should've been it's own origin movie that Warner Bros should've made first before making a goddamn Justice League movie.

This has always been a problem with the DCEU. Rather than proceed in a logical fashion and introduce characters film by film before doing a big team-up, like Marvel did, Warner Bros seemingly threw darts at a wall and made movies in an order decided almost by chance, as a seemingly deliberate move to NOT do things the way Marvel did.

As a result of this fuckwittery, Cyborg never got his own film, and Snyder instead wedged Cyborg's origin story into Justice League. In Whedon's version, it doesn't work, but when you have four hours to mess around with, it does work. Cyborg becomes the emotional core of the film - he has the most heartfelt arc as he tries to deal with a father he never understood; a father who gets a chance to be a "father twice over", but who is initially rejected by Cyborg because he doesn't understand himself, let alone his redemption-seeking father. It's a rich thread, sewn somewhat awkwardly by either Chris Terrio's script or Snyder's direction, but it's far richer than it was in Whedon's cut.

Aside from giving the first two acts room to breathe, the biggest difference between the versions is the entire third act, which is markedly different, and way better in Snyder's cut. The plotting that Warner Bros considered too complicated is fairly straightforward actually, although that's because we've had three hours to warm up to it, to be honest.

I also feel weirdly vindicated. Here's a snippet from my review of Justice League:

"... a mini subplot involving a family holed up in the vicinity of Steppenwolf's base (is) most likely a direct response to the impersonal carnage of Man Of Steel, but it doesn't work and feels completely tacked on."

That subplot was indeed tacked on by Whedon, who was trying to up the stakes of the finale, and failing. Oddly, Snyder's version of the ending is more direct - the world is going to end, and that's all that matters; not saving a Russian family living near an old nuclear power plant. No one cared about that family - it was bad writing. 

I've typed all these words and haven't even mentioned Darkseid. While I understand why Whedon cut him, adding him in helps make Steppenwolf a far more interesting villain. Having said that, both baddies still fall short in Snyder's version because their motives are cliched and typically underdone. The motivations of a good villain should seem reasonable in the right light - destroying a planet to make it look like your homeworld is just dumb. Perhaps one of the biggest faults of the DCEU is its villains. Outside of Zod, I can't really think of a villain whose intentions made sense in a way that just about any Marvel baddie did - maybe Black Manta or maybe Ishmael/Sabbac, but neither of them resonate like Thanos, Namor, Whiplash, Mysterio, The High Evolutionary, or Kilmonger, to name a few.

In a different timeline - one where Snyder did not have to drop out amid horrific personal tragedy, and one where Warner Bros compromised somewhat - Snyder's cut would not have been four hours long, and as a result would've been vastly different. He would've had to pick up the pace in the first half, cut such indulgences as a random Icelandic sing-song or Martian Manhunter's foreshadowing cameo, and might've made some plot changes, such as ignoring the weirdly unneccesary subplot about getting Batman's troop carrier to fly.

But with his unfair advantage of time, Snyder's version is easily the definitive one, and it's actually an enjoyable and well-rounded four hours, even with its slow patches. There is no reason for Whedon's version to exist, except to point out the folly of a studio more concerned with money than art, as most studios are prone to do.